Silent Wonders Wander

Am I carrying you, my secrets and shadows?

Are you finally starting to exist in a larger matter,

That isn't just at home in my mind, a figment of dreams?

Are you solid, the type of creation that when you're grown,

I can hold you in my hands, rock you in my arms?

Only one can be your other maker, my partner in sin--

The one I always wanted, saw at the end of the fantastical aisle.

Are you here? Are you real?

I'm scared but you're who I've always wanted.

I wait and tense, sick with fear and ill with anticipation.

But two lines don't appear, blood is negative.

Part of me is relieved, I don't want you to be in this world just yet.

Part of me is dying once again, because you would've been my biggest dream come true.

Hope that runs on the thin edge of a mental wall, crumbled and high.

I fall, I climb.

I Wish I Could Say

There's so much that goes unsaid. Years and minutes, truths untold.
Said with the eyes, and thumbs that graze buttons but never type.
Hearts that ache, lips that sigh. Secrets held tight within the soul.
Hands clenched tight, bated breaths which linger.
My tongue halts behind the gates of closed teeth,
Wishing for the wants and truths to be seen.
Instead, I move forward, feelings behind closed screens.

Naked Soul

I have never felt so bare.

Not to another, not even to my mirror.

Everything is stripped away, my bones, my skin;

All my flaws, my traits, my shine--

Are on the top of the surface like sea foam

As you wade through it, see me from inside.

You pass easily through, and I'm nervous as hell.

I've been with many, naked flesh I'm confident with, no sweat.

You make me nervous though, more than any other has--

My knees quake a little, that I'm glad you've lain me down.

You're so sweet and kind, while I laugh from my heart.

I never thought of feelings being like this,

And it makes me feel more scared perhaps than I ever have been before.

You pinky-promise me, staring into my eyes--

Past all the layers, to my very soul, and part of me

Never wants to let you go.

Devil's Brother

You're the devil's brother,

No god can grant you serenity

And silent dreams that don't wrack your sleep.

Your words have become banal,

Your touch familiar yet stale.

I yearn for you, a devil's worshiper--

Midnight's prayer.

Stilted Confusion

You can't just talk sweet words--

Flickering sweet flames that flare

In the darkness of our nights, sporadically

Instead of measured periodically

Where one can be sure,

One isn't left to be allowed confusion.

You have to make things happen

If you want wishes to come to fruition.

If you want happiness to come

Like bright rays shining over the hills,

Their grace grazing over your rooftop.