Thank You

You said, you wanted me to be myself.

You said, you loved everything about me.

But your actions were knives to it all--

And I was left, struggling with my emotions.

You led me to think that I was going mad,

But you making me cry is what made it all go bad.

Chorus:

I have no regrets,

Those tears will make me stronger.

You mad me learn, what I didn't know yet,

And made me remember--

That I'm not dead.

So thank you, thank you

For showing me I can still open my heart.

Thank you, thank you

For showing me that the ice is gone.

I needed this, no matter how short it was.

I hope you can forgive me someday.

We weren't right for each other,

I had to end it all to save one another.

Chorus

Kisses and wishes,

we were two twenty-somethings,

Needing saving and redeeming from our pasts.

I couldn't handle it,

I was ready but the intensity was too much.

I'm sorry for breaking your heart.

Chorus

So thank you, thank you

You made me feel my heart beat again

Chorus

Message in the Stall

I was in a bathroom stall,

Waiting to go to a lecture on Cognitive thinking—

And its place in society.

Whilst I read the scrawl on the enclosed wall,

My temper began to rise.

For incompetence was in front of my eyes.

Whomever had written in black Sharpie,

What she deemed “positive” and inspirational,

Should be clocked in the head with a two-by-four.

People with such ignorance to mix what she said next to

The good lines of “You are BEAUTIFUL”

And be-who-you-are statements,

That have long faded—

I’m sorry to say,

But I wish I could kick her ass.

I wonder how old she is,

What she has seen with her life…

A person who has faced the darkness

Would never say shit like that.

In uneven lining on the dirty surface,

This stranger had written:

“Giving up hope is the same as SUICIDE.”

Oh dear girl, how wrong you are,

Have you not known what either is like?

Well, it is evident you must not have,

Because one who has come near suicide,

Or lost someone close—

We know…oh yes, we KNOW

What it is that lurks inside

And what each entails.

You are thinking with the brainwashed mind

That anything negative is damnation, it appears.

Do you not realize

That even angels cry?

Saints have lost hope at times…not all of them committed suicide.

No, many pushed past, they found something within—

I think I see a paradox to the tale of Pandora’s box—

They did what they should have,

And many of them were killed,

Yet it was not by their own hand.

Dear girl, who writes on bathroom stalls,

Do me a favor, and look inside the human soul.

Do me a favor, and learn your history, psychology—

Understand the mind, the heart, the essence of humanity.

Here is a reminder, a quite real one at that

Before you start preaching and comparing a feeling to an act:

Hope can be regained,

A life cannot.

***Above is a picture of the real message the drove me to write this poem, written upon one of the stalls in Edwards Hall at the college I attend.